Balanced Bits

How Much of Work (and Life) is a Game?

I still continue to believe that success at work (and at life) requires a combination of content and style. I wrote about it when I first started blogging. This post is about the "style" you have while doing your job and the perception of your peers and your management about you at work. The "content" side of your job is pretty straightforward:

• Doing what is expected and needed
• Doing things the right way
• Delivering expected results

I don't know your job, so I can't tell you what you need to do. But I'd like you to think about how you do it, the style with which you do so.

• How do you handle adversity? If things are bad at work, what shows when someone looks at you? Do they know that you feel beaten or that you are going to rise to this challenge and be successful no matter what?
• Do you make your boss look good? Your boss still manages your career, gives you pay raises, etc. Have you ever thought about how your work makes him or her look better?
• How about your peer interaction? I'm not expecting you to make all your best friends at work, but do you occasionally go to lunch or out for a drink after work? It's important. And you might like it.
• Are you coming across as hardworking as you are? I hate to say it, but you occasionally need to toot your own horn. You can be subtle and still do it directly—by sharing some new, fresh ideas with your manager. And remember your accomplishments and why they are important to the business.

Some interpersonal and visibility thoughts:

• Work well with your peers and others, all the time. Don't sulk, don't be snarky, don't be seen complaining (save if for the dinner table at home—occasionally.)
• I worked late most nights doing all my email. But if you don't have that much time do you at least read the mails to you from your boss and respond to those?
• If you have chat systems (AOL IM, Lotus Sametime, etc.) are you visible off hours? Cheesy, eh? Well—that's life (oops, I mean work!).

What's negative?

• The employee who comes across with no initiative.
• The employee who can't seem to navigate across the organization.
• The employee who doesn't smile when given a challenge.

We've all heard that aphorism that "perception is reality". It's true and you have to think about your how others perceive you. If you get a confusing or difficult assignment does any negativity come through to your boss? Even if you have no idea, approach every task in a positive manner and start to dig in.

What about Life? Do these same tenets hold? You bet! As a matter of fact you might behave better in the office because you might have some odd thought that something important is at stake (like your livelihood). But at home, if you want to be grumpy what's the problem? Well—what about your relationships?

So be that hardworking, smiling person in the office and at home. As Gillette said in 1984, "Never let them see you sweat".

Photo Credit: Martin Cathrae

This Job is Killing Me: Work-Life and Boundaries

Blog scope: Those relatively young in their careers. Perhaps less than 10 years in the business world. (Although this should be a good reinforcing lesson for all.)

I'm troubled. In my post on the new normal, I felt that many of us have become employees that are too worried about keeping their jobs to even think about themselves and their work-lives. Just keep your head low, do your job well and not rock the boat about going to a kid's soccer game or shifting work hours. Not good.

We know that technology enables us to be always working and I see that as an enabler to good work-life balance. The question is whether you are always under pressure to be available and responsive to your boss. It seems now as if the urgency of responsiveness is expected vs. it being that extra effort. Who is in control of your time?

Let me first say that for much of my latter career I was a bit of a workaholic. But at that point, my children were a bit older and we had a developed working family routine for two working parents with a good support structure. I chose this as I was becoming more visible and felt I was advancing to becoming an executive. I also felt that there was a reasonable give and take in terms of my commitment to the business and what I was given back in current (and hopefully future) compensation. I managed my work-life balance staying up late doing email, instant messaging with colleagues, etc. That said, when I was fairly senior and I saw a more junior person online, I would pressure them to get off the system and spend time with their family

Don't we all want to advance our careers and shouldn't we be pushing, pushing all the time? I don't think so. Be excellent at it all - in balance. Do a great job at work but make sure you have boundaries. If you are relatively junior in the business, you should not be indispensable. Don't answer your phone when you are on vacation. Don't work every evening. Work your family.

Look, work will ebb and flow and you will be putting in extraordinary time commitments at times. But if this is becoming a habit, then you need to think about what treadmill you have jumped onto and if this is what you really want. There is no wrong answer—just be thoughtful about where you are in life and what the ramifications of your work decisions will be outside of work.

A colleague of mine went away with family for a few days and left his laptop at home. He knew what was he had to get done and that he'd get it done on time. He also knew that having his laptop would be too great a temptation to disengage from what was more important—his family. Well done!

With good communications around expectations of what it due and when and what the expectations of your availability should be, it should still be a win-win where your employer wins with you as an employee and you win on work-life.

Remember that it's not a matter of flipping the bird at your management chain to find your balance. At least not while they can see.

Photo credit: Seattle Municipal Archives. (I found great pictures of all men or all women, but not a mixed pool. That, in itself, is kind of interesting.)

The Looking for a Job Guide to Work-Life

First, calm down. You are in tough times. This will show what you are made of.

Let's get some basic definitions out of the way.

• Work is generating income. You might even be one of the ever increasing numbers of boomerang kids and live with your parents, but go get a minimum wage job. Or two!
• Life is basic living: a roof over your head, food and transportation.

In many cases the financial equation doesn't close. You might have to rely on the support of family or friends (couch surfing), but hopefully you will return the favor someday. Prioritization takes on a whole new meaning within these narrow definitions. Meeting friends in an expensive coffee shop might not something you can afford.

Despite all the hours you might be spending behind a cash register, your number one job is finding a job. Spend as much time as you possibly can on this.

• Do you have a great resume? Does it tell "your story"? Make sure your activities have common themes that ties to what you want to do. (And if you are pursuing a few different jobs, it is ok to have a few different resumes).
• Are you pursuing all options? Not only should you check all the job listing sites, but you should be looking at all the companies that you might be interested in and seeing what openings they have on their web sites.
• Do not think that an application or an email is it. Be aggressive - try to call the company and find people to speak with.
• Find other people to talk with and get advice. Ask for an "informational interview". Every few networking calls will yield another networking call and these calls increase your odds significantly.

Leverage every contact you have who might be able to refer you to a company. It is completely naive to think you can do this without any help from others who might know someone. And don't worry about it. A connection is merely opening a door. Your personality and skills keep you in the game.

And when you get an interview, treat it with great importance. Do you homework. Know the company well and be able to position yourself within that company. Read about business. Read about the industry. Read sites like Career Realism. Take nothing for granted.

All this hard work and perseverance will pay off. Once established in a job you can step back and take a broader look at your career and your life. One step at a time.

The Starting Out Work-Life Roadmap

Gather 'round all ye who are done with college and are fortunate to have found a job. For those who are still seeking employment, I'll have a post for you in the near future.

What matters? Finding the balance and being happy in most of what you do! As you will spend a large percentage of your life working, you have to be happy with your job choice. You also need to make sure you are happy with what you do when not working and even that requires some thinking and planning.

Let's take this in simple steps.

1. Be successful at work. Treat your job very, very seriously. Don't worry at the outset about career or income growth. Just be successful. Listen and learn and try to make a positive impact on those around you.
2. Don't worry too much about your short term accommodations. Find a place that doesn't put a burden on your work success. Many people choose longer commutes, but that puts a burden on you while you are starting out. What matters initially is all about ensuring you can focus on your job.
3. Then determine where to live to balance your social life with your work needs. OK - the first hard choice. Do you want to go out every night with friends or on weekends? What activities are important to you outside of work? Questions like this will influence where you choose to live. Maybe that longer commute is ok for you once you are established at work.
4. Enjoy life. You are too young to dedicate yourself fully to money and a career. As you'll likely be working for the next thirty to forty years or more, don't become that workaholic. Talking out of both sides of my mouth, see #1 above. But please find that balance to ensure you are happy.

Many of you might drift away from your parents as those college days move into the past and you take this opportunity to figure out what makes you happy with your friends, relationships and your family. (Please don't cross family off your list, btw. You should never lose this important connection—trust me).

Once you are settled in, it might be time to take a look back and see if you are on the right career path. Are you happy? Ask your management if they see you growing. Always keep career thoughts simmering on the back burner (it is never turned off) and recognize when it is time to turn up the heat on a promotional or new work opportunity.

And if you need to relocate for work, plan to start a different set of decisions. It will get harder as the life part of work-life grows in importance. No one said it would be easy. But it is all worth it.

(And apologies for the poorly drawn map. It was the best I could do. I hope it made you smile.)

Has "The New Normal" Impacted Work-Life?

We have had a horrible financial decade, now statistically coming out of the worst economic crisis since The Great Depression. And while businesses are showing signs of life, unemployment continues to be too high.

Layoffs are way of corporate life with companies tightening down wherever they can to deliver to their shareholders. Whatever relationship existed between a company and an employee has broken down. Employees expect less, fear more and employers are happy to accommodate.

I grew up in a paternalistic company where it was anticipated that you would work for a full career. Although I worked there for over three decades, the environment changed many years ago as managing one's career evolved to be a two-way street. Be competitive in the job marketplace to be wanted by your company. Simple.

But even in that context, loyalty seems to be gone in the majority of large corporations. With scarce jobs and not much changing, we are in what many have called "The New Normal". And it seems that work-life discussions may be suffering.

Work-life is all about tradeoffs. And in many cases, it is the shifting of work time to make sure that family or personal time happens. I want all of us to be successful at work, but I want that work success to be in context of a bigger picture. The objective is that professionals understand that they don't need to miss out on all the important things in family and relationships. If you're not happy at home, then your work will suffer... and vice-versa, by the way.

So - what do we do when our work lives have the shadow of layoffs hanging over us? Can you really go to that soccer game if you think the person in the office next to you is more visible than you and perhaps one of you will be laid off? Is it no longer an option to focus on things at home and have a little work-life balance?

Yes, more and more companies are providing flexible work environments and we see people working at home and taking advantage of a 24 hour day for work and life. But I'm worried that the courage required to declare a life decision in this New Normal is being threatened.

I'm not sure I like what the future holds.

Photo Credit: Kevin Dooley

I've Retired! A work-life milestone.

I didn't go to work today. I no longer have my ThinkPad and my Blackberry sits in my desk drawer where I will eventually extract personal phone numbers and email addresses.

No sadness; it's not even bittersweet. It feels good. It remind me of how my wife and I felt when we did that Freshman year, college drop-off thing. Although we saw many teary eyed parents, we were smiling and our kids were smiling, too. We were all ready as it was just time for this next phase of life (for all). And this is time feels that same way.

On June 26, 1978 I sat through the new hire orientation at an IBM Laboratory in Kingston, NY totally without a clue about work or life. I had spent the prior six years at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute getting a BS, an MS and a playing a whole lot of Ultimate Frisbee. I was aware that I had grown up - a little - but that I was far from a fully formed adult.

Thirty-two years later I look back on so much. During my career I was privileged to travel the world, do things that impacted markets and be part of the team that helped shape IBM's software business. I have been married for thirty-one years and my wife and I raised two wonderful children, a son, 24, and our daughter, now 22. So much to be proud of.

So why did I do it? I could easily have spent many more years at IBM and continued to enjoy going to work every day. But I am very fortunate to be able to afford to do this and I really want to do different things. I am far from ready to be a couch potato or to sit out on the porch. (And our return from visiting our son when he was in Senegal showed us that what we need is far different than what we want. We really don't need much).

I might be closer to being a fully formed adult, but I am still growing and learning. Our personal lives now have different challenges that will require me to continue to grow and change. And I want different intellectual and professional challenges to keep me energized. (Those that know me well must be shaking their heads as I am always energized!)

So that's it. I made some wonderful professional and personal friends over these years. Time will tell, but I expect and hope that many of these friendships will continue. I'm counting on LinkedIn to help, too.

Although I might be slightly out of touch from some of the corporate experiences that provide blog fodder, I still expect to hear from some of the people I mentor. I am also very sure that all the new endeavors I'm pursuing and all the new life changes will be more than sufficient to keep me blogging. All your feedback on my blog and my presentations is so very important - so thank you.

I'll be sharing some of my plans and new roles in future posts. In the meantime, the engines of my new work-life have started. No rocking chair for me.

Photo Credit

Becoming an executive and not forgetting life

This guest post comes from Tami Cannizzaro who worked for me many years ago and today is an executive in IBM. It is a pleasure to watch young talent develop and have career success and it is even more rewarding when I see work-life balance ingrained so deeply into all she did. Although written from an IBM perspectives, I'm sure you'll agree that this message is universal.

While at the office I find myself maniacally focused on getting the job done to get home for dinner with my kindergarden-age daughter. Work/Life balance is always for me a matter of driving the highest productivity for myself and my team in order to insure I can spend sufficient quality time at home. I set the standard for leaving at 5PM back when I was a staff person & have kept to it. Granted, I'm often on until midnight picking up the pieces but I am able to keep my precious 5-8PM every night with my daughter. I'm sure I'm the talk of the Somers [editor's note: we work in Somers, NY] water-cooler many a day for leaving the office at 5.... but I walk out proudly and without apology knowing the work will get done. I was recently asked to write an article on the skills you need to make it to the executive ranks. I believe this list will also help you to be more productive and at the end of the day spend more time with your family.  

So here is my top 10 list of the skills that will help you be a more productive employee and help to make sure you are headed for the executive ranks.

1. Be Concise. I cannot underscore the importance of strong communications skills at IBM. Almost without exception, they are a critical differentiator. The ability to write an email on a complex topic using simple concise language is critical. For email, stick to three to four short, tight sentences and never go beyond a few short paragraphs. Given the volume of email IBMers receive, poorly written emails are a productivity drain and make a poor impression on the reader. A good writer makes a good impression on a daily basis to management and peers.
2. Have an Opinion. Have you ever been on a call with several people and no one seems to be in the position to make a clear decision? Be ready to choose A over B. Provide a concise reason and move toward consensus. I've seen many a project fail or languish due to the lack of a decisive leader. You will be recognized for taking a position and moving the project forward. I thank you; your team thanks you!
3. Be an Innovator. Innovation stands out. It helps to lift us above the monotony of our everyday plans to something that is better, that is worthy of notice. Too many times, we are guilty of rolling out a plan that is good, but status quo. It's a bit harder, but reach just a little bit further for something that's worth it. The IBM brand is associated with innovation - make sure you are helping to drive this innovative spirit at IBM when delivering new products, new campaigns or new approaches to how the work gets done.
4. Collaborate. Don't be afraid to collaborate. Sharing the work may mean sharing the credit, but the end product is usually worth it. The talent and expertise at IBM is arguably limitless. When we can tap into the right people, the right information, for the right project - there is no limit to what we as a diversely talented team can accomplish. Build a team, grab a whiteboard or set up a Lotus-live session, and collaborate on something that will make a difference for our customers, for our company.
5. Be a Leader. Whether you're a band 8 [mid-level staff] or a new Director, be a leader. Offer to run the project, offer to build the plan, offer to solve the problem. There are many followers and hard workers, but the leaders will stand out and get a reputation as leaders. Leaders get noticed. Leaders get promotions. Leaders, well . . . lead. You get the idea.
6. Develop a Brand. What are you known for? Are people aware that you will deliver, that you are a problem solver? Build your reputation through consistent good performance. If you want to be known for your collaborative influence, you need to build that reputation and stick to it. If you're having a bad day, or if you're not feeling collaborative, don't let it show. Stay true to your brand. Be known for something and drive it home every day at the office.
7. Don't Get Derailed. Is someone raising their voice in a meeting? Has a colleague just dumped their work on you and gone on a six-week vacation. Excellent! This is your chance to rise above it, take the high road and stay true to your brand. Tami is here, she'll deliver for us. She would never lose her cool in a meeting or drop a project mid-stream. You get the idea. In the long run, you will be rewarded for your hard work, talent, dedication and consistency. Don't get derailed by a bad meeting, a bad day or a bad project. It's simply not worth it.
8. Look the Part. Have you paid close attention to the executive presence exhibited by our GMs and VPs? Have you walked the hallways at Armonk? These execs simply look the part. The IBM Brand is a classic brand, and IBM is known for quality - quality products, quality people, and quality services. Make sure you pass muster. Ask yourself: "Do I look like an executive from IBM"? If you don't, it's not too late. Consider a wardrobe upgrade, keep an eye on your communications style and most importantly, develop the confidence that goes along with it. Stand in front of the mirror and say three times: I am an IBM Executive. Believable?
9. Seek Diverse Experience. One thing every senior executive has at IBM — lots of experience. Experience working in different parts of the world, in different parts of the business. In order to run an $100 billion company, one might imagine you need to know a thing or two about business, even for those in technical roles. Are you seeing customers? Do you understand the P&L? Do you know how to market your way out of a paper bag? Can you articulate the product portfolio? Do you know the channel? Take a hard look at your IBM resume. Does it show diversity of experience and know-how? It matters. If yours doesn't, the guy next to you has a resume that does.
10. Be Passionate. If there is one common denominator that defines the IBM executive (and this is my humble opinion only), it's a passion for the business. A passion for delivering high quality. A passion for making the right strategic moves. A passion for making the tough calls. A passion for knowing that if we get it right, our people will be taken care of and the legacy of IBM will grow under our stewardship. Don't be afraid to show your passion for the IBM business. If you love the company, it will love you. Sounds sappy, I know. But I believe it.

So there you have it, my top 10 list for getting ahead and for getting noticed at IBM. I'm working on my own list for further advancement. Do I represent the IBM brand well? Is my team getting the leadership they need from me? Are my communications consistently crisp and comprehensive? Do I demonstrate leadership and always model good behavior? I'm looking in the mirror. And who knows, someday I may build up enough skills, enough experience, and enough executive presence to walk with the big guys!

Tami Cannizzaro is an IBM Director. She leads an organization responsible for the rollout of Smart Work in support of IBM's broader Smarter Planet initiative. Previously  at IBM, Tami was involved in establishing the IBM IMPACT event, an annual conference which hosts 6,000 attendees and is focused on technical education around SOA and the supporting product lines. Tami joined IBM in 2001 after receiving her MBA from New York University while working on Wall Street as a Research Analyst. Today, Tami lives in Westchester County, New York with her husband and young daughter. She enjoys hiking, swimming and cycling in her free time.

Top 10 Photo Credit: Sam Churchill

This post represent the views of Tami and not of IBM.

Work-Life and the Single Person

via Ask Balanced Bits, Amy wrote:

Jon -- I enjoy reading what you have to say about working parents and people in the "sandwich" generation ... taking care of kids and elders, but one thing is missing: the category of "singletons" in the workforce (those of us without kids and partners). The perception is we're out having our fabulous social lives, dancing until midnight, and spending our paychecks willy nilly without a care in the world. This is sadly not the case -- we also juggle work/life/volunteer activities/friends/fitness/civic engagement/etc. I know it's not as stressful as juggling work, kids, elders, but that is the rub .. often managers tend to take us single folks for granted. What do you think?

Great comment, Amy. I try hard to be inclusive but it might be fair to say that I sometimes gloss over the singles' issue. There is also a lot in what you say about manager's tendencies.

One single-only challenge that I often talk about is for those that might be working in a suburban location. Far from a social hot spot, there might not much to do when the local area is populated with families and most workers just return home to spend time with them. I suggest to the singles in my office in upper Westchester County to live in New York City and take that reverse commute when being in the office is needed.

That one example aside, the issues for the singles are the same. As a matter of fact, the gravitational pull to decide to work more is strong while the family yin to that work yang might not be as strong.

So what do you do?

• Recognize that working long hours is a career choice, but that you have many, many alternatives for the "life" side of work-life. Maybe even more than a non-single? You articulated many.
• If you make the choice, ensure that your manager knows that you aren't a complete 24x7 work person and that you do have a life and intend to find balance (and still do an exceptional job at work, you might add).

So thanks, Amy. Keep raising your hand and ensuring that no one, especially me, has any blinders on.

Photo Credit: elmago_delmar

Your Next Job with No Sleight of Hand

What's the difference between:

Manager: "Stay with me, keep doing what you are doing and I'll take care of you"

You: "But I've been doing this job for a long time and this other opportunity looks like it can be good for me and I'd like to go do it"

Manager: "That's what you think but I'll be able to give you more responsibility in this role over time and within 6 months I'll be able to promote you".

 - - and - -

"Follow the cards and tell me where the Queen is".

Don't make the second bet and be very, very thoughtful before you take the first bet.

You have to ask yourself if your manager has the same interest and commitment to you career as you do. S/he should, but it isn't always the case.

Why? Because your manager is a human being, someone who just might have her/his career interest ahead of yours. Whenever someone moves out of a job, it is a challenge to find qualified backfill and get that person up to speed. It is so easy, so convenient to have you just stay. So you might hear the words about your career, but you have to judge the sincerity.

Also, keep in mind that staying in the same place isn't necessary the right approach for growing your career. Breadth of experience can count for a lot and you should also think about avoiding stagnation. Take the long view when thinking about a job change. Leverage your mentors and perhaps even trust them more than your manager.

[Some negative vibes here and I'm sorry. Some managers really do take the broader view and care about your career as much as you do. They also could take a broader view than you would be able to. As I've said before generalities are tough - but I still like the message of this post.]

Nonetheless, you have to decide what is important in your career. Only you are able to think about the job and your career and also put it in context of your personal life choices. When bringing life into the thinking, there is no right answer, except your answer!

And, as a last piece advice, please ensure that your mentor isn't directly in your line of management as s/he might just be asking you to identify which cup has the ball under it.

Queen Photo Credit: Voxtheory

Cups and Balls Photo Credit: Wahlander

Real Life Mentoring - Going Global and Not Going Crazy

Recently, I was on a very cool "virtual" work-life panel discussion for technical leaders across my company. I was one of three panelists in an audio conference with a group chat function enabled and a global audience participating.

One of the first questions came from someone in India who asked:

"What are your suggestions for work-life balance for people who work extended hours, weekends and are on call pretty much consistently for business reasons."

Many of us do have to participate in conference calls across many time zones.

• For a US East Coast company, you will often find people on the West Coast up at 5am for calls.
• If you are US based and need to talk with many people in Asia, then you are going to be taking calls after your dinner.
• And we often ask people overseas to participate in call at all hours of their days or nights.

(If anyone had to participate in an 8 hour meeting on "non-working" hours, we are talking agony).

As an added point, e-mail doesn't necessarily make work-life challenges worse. The expectation that you need to respond to e-mail 24 hours a day is what makes them worse.

So what's the answer?

• Do your job well. Be successful in your job by being flexible in your work hours as needed. Accept it as part of your job.
• Don't forget the rest of your daily life. If you have a call at 5am, find the time later in the day when you are going to step out of work and focus on non-work things. Same if you have an evening call.

So how do you do it?

Communicate, Communicate, Communicate. Set expectations.

And remember -- don't think about stopping work. Think about what is that you have chosen to start! And do it.

Photo credit: Bahaish Kapoor